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Monday, December 9, 2013

Memoirs of a Lagos City Hustler (LCH) - Part 6 #LCH


Hi.... byeee (that's all I can muster right now). TIRED.COM!!


Part 6......

I was working my ass off on a research paper to submit as draft for my thesis(yes I'm an educated street boy with a MBA), my stupid modem decided to be a draw back and without hesitation, I carried my laptop and biked to the nearest internet Hotspot to continue my research(partly because I was a week due on submission and also wanted to leave my dark evil room that finds a way of keeping me indoors for days). I was minding my own business but couldn't resist noticing this rough guy beside me with an iPad, Blalackberry Q10, iPhone and a car key on his table, also a half bottle of champagne and a Mac Laptop. So much profanity and vanity couldn't let me concentrate besides, his command of English was a laxative to my bowels yet this guy was way richer than me, How?


After like an hour, he asked me if I could mask his IP(for non-geeks, that's when you hide your computer information and it looks like you are browsing from another country), I told him it was easy and did it in a flash and went back to my thesis, he drew his seat beside me and couldn't stop blabbing. He said if anyone else wanted to do it, they would have charged him 10,000 naira and I asked him if he would prefer to pay me rather than shut up to continue whatever he was doing. He begged if he could learn it from me and ordered a bottle of champagne for me, I told the waiter to hold on to it as I put him through. He gave me 30,000 naira after 2-Hours of teaching him.

I found out he was a 'game-boy'(yahoo-yahoo) and when I asked him why he chose that route, he asked me if I would prefer he robbed houses or be a nuisance to the society. I sat him down and gave him a lecture about businesses he could invest in, matured ethics(and not flashing your possessions). He was so intrigued, right there he registered for a course online at the University of Liverpool, we talked about investing in friends and real estate, a frontier business to have and building a house for himself. He was so excited about our discussion that he gave me 20,000 naira extra(don't know why they carry so much cash) and offered to take me out, I turned down his offer nicely and we exchanged numbers,he paid his bill and left.

I went to the bartender and asked how much a bottle of champagne cost and he said 25,000 naira and I politely asked him to refund 20,000 naira for my champagne paid by the dude and keep the extra 5,000 naira. He couldn't stop thanking me(you don't make that much tip in a week) and by the time I left the cafe, I was 70,000 naira richer(that's an average graduate's salary in Lagos) but with an incomplete thesis. I did not mind, I was ready to retry the annoying modem. It was almost closing time for the banks when I rushed in to deposit 65,000 naira into my account.

I do not support scams and frauds, but I see our leaders siphoning the country's wealth, I see no jobs being created, I see a frustrated education system, I see bad roads, I see an environment where entrepreneurs struggle to stay afloat, I see a failing legal and electoral system, I see the social media being used for the wrong reasons, I see petty 'kleptos' being jailed for life while 'politrobbers' ride around with sirens! If sharing knowledge and ideas could fetch me 70,000 naira in 6 hours, I might as well share with the devil himself, what counts at the end is who you impact change and knowledge to and how much money you get.....well I did both and reaped something.

Do have a great week entrepreneurs(and mum-preneurs) and don't forget to impact into someone and make this.......err.......PAPER!!!!